2 Ki. 25: The Bubble Bursts

2 Kings 25:21 "So Judah went into captivity, away from her land. "

Babylon is still being used as the hand of judgement against Israel.

Well, as expected, Zedekiah's rebellion against Babylon was ridiculously ill-conceived and short-lived. Nebuchadnezzar responded with seige, and killing. It reads like a depressing last-ditch effort by Zedekiah to reclaim what was taken, instead losing all. After trying to flee, the royal family was wiped out, the officials of the army and temple and the palace were killed, and all the treasures from the palace and the temple were taken. I wonder if the Babylonians knew about the Philistine's troubles with the ark...if they took it, and it survived the fire.

Babylon's soldiers basically ran in and tore the place down. They set fires and knocked down walls. I imagine there was little resistance. Already weakened by famine and defeat, the inhabitants of Jerusalem were no match for the professional invaders.

I wonder if it would have been any different had Zedekiah consulted God before attacking Babylon. Perhaps he would have been reminded of how one of Joshua's first incursions failed. 

Anyway, Nebuchadnezzar puts Gedaliah in charge of Judah, and they assassinate him and run for the hills.

Eventually, Nebucadnezzar's son, Evil-Merodach releases the still-imprisoned Jehoiachin, and seats him at his table, and even gives him an allowance. What's that about? Was Evil-Merodach being good, or condescending? Just seems kind of odd.

Judah and Israel appear to have come to an end. They have no leader. No one has been anointed. And this is because they turned to the right or the left from God's commands. Everything happened as God promised, even if it was bad stuff.

2 Ki. 24: More Bad Kings

2 Kings 24:14 "He (Nebuchadnezzar) carried into exile all Jerusalem: all the officers and fighting men, and all the craftsmen and artisans—a total of ten thousand. Only the poorest people of the land were left." 

Jehoiakim was firmly under the thumb of Nebuchadnezzar, the king of Babylon, but then decided to rebel for some reason. Terrible idea. The LORD, who was intent on the destruction of Judah, sent raiders from all over the place to keep Jehoiakim busy and distracted. Of course Jehoiakim is crushed, and his son takes over. Still repercussions from Manasseh's shedding of innocent blood during his reign.

At least they didn't have to worry about Egypt, since Nebuchadnezzar took all that land.

Jehoiachin succeeds Jehoiakim, and things only get worse. Nebuchadnezzar himself even went to Jerusalem during Babylon's seige. Easy pickings, apparently. Anyway, basically anyone with any worth was taken away to Babylon, leaving only the poor. All the LORD's treasures, since the LORD was using Babylon to judge Judah, became Nebuchadnezzar's. He then sent a force to Jerusalem to keep them in line, and then installs Jehoiachin's uncle Mattaniah as king. And he was evil too. Nebuchadnezzar, who became Israel's name changer, goes with Zedekiah for Mattaniah. Zedekiah rebels, and since Zed was evil, this could only end well.

2 Ki. 23: Josiah's 180

2 Kings 23:22 "Not since the days of the judges who led Israel, nor throughout the days of the kings of Israel and the kings of Judah, had any such Passover been observed."

The kingship in Judah looks like a turnover-filled football game. One king will run Judah one way, another king will immediately run it back the other way. And with fervor. No kings appear to just be go-to-work type kings. Either they are ardently for the LORD, or against. And passionately so, and it appears to be tied to religion.

What Josiah does to turn Judah back to the LORD reads like a religious who's who of the idols and practices of the day. Judah, in their polytheism, basically did it all. Baal. Asherah. Starry hosts. High places. Child sacrifice to Molech. The sun, Ashtoreth, Chemosh and Ashtoreth. The mediums, the spiritists, the household gods and the idols. He went so far as to slaughter the priests of the idols, and burn them on the altars meant for these other gods.

Then he commanded the celebration of Passover. Which sounds familiar, but hasn't even been mentioned since Joshua 5. commentary Like a thousand years ago.

But the LORD was still angry because of Manasseh, and despite Josiah's efforts to remove and destroy these things, Josiah was out of luck, and was killed by the Pharaoh when he took Judah to war. Josiah was even described as following the LORD with all his heart, with all his soul, and with all his strength (Dt. 6:5). What was the reason for this? Why did the seemingly innocent Josiah have to pay for the actions of Manasseh and those before him? And Judah, the land of David would be subject to the same judgement as Israel.

Jehoahaz is Josiah's replacement, but is imprisoned by Pharaoh Neco so he could rule from Jerusalem. Basically an evil king, he turns Judah back around. Jehoahaz dies in captivity, and Josiah's next son, Eliakim is put on the throne by Neco, but is given the name Jehoiakim for some reason. Jehoiakim paid Neco protection money from the taxes. Jehoiakim was evil too.

And I react to this thusly. If God had allowed Josiah to keep ruling, perhaps Judah wouldn't have fallen into these evil kings this soon. But, probably, someone would have. And the hard truth of it is, Judah was in need of judgement, the way God saw it. And Josiah was the unfortunate innocent bearer of blood.

2 Ki. 22: A Humble Man Rises

2 Kings 22:19 "Because your heart was responsive and you humbled yourself before the LORD when you heard what I have spoken against this place and its people, that they would become accursed and laid waste, and because you tore your robes and wept in my presence, I have heard you, declares the LORD."

Josiah, another boy king, does right in the eyes of God. Isn't that the case? Except for Manasseh, at least, but Joash was also described as doing what was right in the eyes of the LORD in chapter 12. Children, really. Without their faith tainted by years of human "example."

After 18 years on the throne, Josiah decides its time for remodeling the temple...which probably was in disrepair from lack of use. While the men are fixing it up, they find the book of the law. Which was quite the discovery. How long was it hidden? How was there any sense of right? Was it merely orally passed on? Like a 1000-year game of telephone? It could be an excuse for the state of evil Israel and Judah perpetually found themselves in, had not there been some positive examples along the way.

Anyway, the book is read to Josiah, and of course its very bad news, considering Israel's recent history. He is distraught by this reading, and consults the prophetess Huldah. Its of course not good news for the people or the land, but because Josiah had the sense to humble himself before God, and set his heart right, Josiah himself would be spared from that calamity. God wanted that humility, and did not get it very often. When I think about it, these laws are about humility. About not chasing after self, but living according to what God prescribed. And great reward or evasion of tragedy are the result.

2 Ki. 21: Manasseh's 180

2 Kings 21:17 "I will stretch out over Jerusalem the measuring line used against Samaria and the plumb line used against the house of Ahab. I will wipe out Jerusalem as one wipes a dish, wiping it and turning it upside down."

Well, the spiritual prosperity was realtively short-lived. Manasseh, Hezekiah's son, didn't pay attention to how his dad ran the place. But he must have at least seen how his grandfather Ahaz did things. Chapter 21 reads a lot like chapter 16. Manasseh was a reformer as his father was, except for evil. Anything his dad tore down, Manasseh restored. Polytheism, child sacrifice, polytheism, desecrating the temple, shedding innocent blood, Manasseh did it all.

And God, of course, was not pleased. This was Judah. Israel had already failed miserably, and now God threatened to deal with Judah the same way, which is what I think that whole business about the measuring line and the plumb line means. As Samaria was devastated, plundered, and resettled, so will Jerusalem. As Ahab was dealt with, so then will be the leaders of Judah. And wiping out the dish...he wants to remove the contents from it...he will keep the dish. Again, God's commitment to a promised land is emphasized, as is his rebuke of his people who refuse to keep his covenant. Whoever comes in and plunders Judah will be used by God, but will still be an enemy of God.

Manasseh kicks off at 67, and is replaced by his 22-year-old son Amon. Amon is Manasseh part II. He basically walks in the same way as his father. Which is not good. Long-lasting reign? Hardly. Two years after his coronation, he is assassinated by his officials. And this is weird, because the people didn't want him assassinated, apparently, because they in turn murdered Amon's killers. So there was some sense of "an eye for an eye" that remained. Or does that speak to a murderous nature embedded in Judah's culture at the time?

Josiah is installed after Amon.

2 Ki. 20: Hezekiah Winds it Down

2 Kings 20:10 "It is a simple matter for the shadow to go forward ten steps," said Hezekiah. "Rather, have it go back ten steps."

King Hezekiah gets old, and he has a boil or something, and he's told by Isaiah to put his house in order. Hmmm...no one likes to hear that. So he prays in tears before God to remember him, and how Hezekiah sought to walk in the ways of God. And God heard Hezekiah, and added 15 years to his life. Which is nice, but...who wants to know the exact moment they will die. I'd host my own funeral. The preservation of Hezekiah was also a preservation of Jerusalem from Assyira, apparently. His son, Manasseh, was next in line, and who knows what would have happened. Lets hope he taught him some good things.

In asking for a sign from the LORD for his healing, Hezekiah doesn't ask for much. He just wants to see the shadow recede up the stairs. In other words, for the earth to rotate the other way for a couple of hours. That's all.

The king of Babylon heard about Hezekiah's illness, and sends him spies...I mean...messengers, a "Get Well Soon" envoy, as it were, with mylar balloons and those little flowers and all that. For some reason, Hezekiah shows the messengers all of the riches in Jerusalem's storehouses. He hides nothing. I don't know why he would do this, and it earns him a rebuke from Isaiah later on. Perhaps Hezekiah just thought the best of Babylon's king and people, figuring these were now going to be his allies. 

Because of this error, Isaiah prophesies that it's all going to be carried off, and some of Hezekiah's own sons will become eunuch's in the Babylonian palace. Nice. There's no offspring in eunucy. Hezekiah still manages to call this good, possibly because he trusts God, but I wonder if it's because he believes he won't be around to see it?

2 Ki. 19: God is Like, Whaaat?

2 Kings 19:27 "But I know where you stay and when you come and go and how you rage against me." 

Hezekiah's staff is understandably distressed by what Sennacherib was saying. Who wouldn't be?Israel had a poor recent history of defending itself. Foreign leaders did whatever they wanted, took what they wanted, and basically pushed everyone around. Why would Sennacherib, "Snatch-Up-A-Rib" as my classmates at Grace Bible College called him, be any different? But Hezekiah at least shows some hope in verse 4 that the LORD could prevent it, where other leaders would have caved instantly.

Isaiah's like, "Don't sweat it, he'll get some bad news, and then get sworded. No big deal."

Sennacherib does what most do who don't rely on the LORD. He depends on his own reputation and past accomplishments, believing they will stand up against God. And of course he believes this, he conquered all these other nations who weren't ruled by God, and frankly, probably did it with God's own power, to set up this showdown.

Hezekiah asks God to show His power and "do his thing" with Assyria, so that the nations would know, realizing that these other gods are not "Gods," but things fashioned by men.

Isaiah relays a message from God concerning Assyria that is pretty vivid. Where Sennacherib assumed he was in control, it is God who will do what he wants. Where Sennacherib exalts himself, God will humiliate him. Where Sennacherib thinks he steps on his own property, it belongs to God ultimately. Where Sennacherib believes he has destroyed morale, God will be their hope.

And perhaps the most damning part of the prophecy is that Assyria won't even have a chance to march on Jerusalem...won't even be able to fire one arrow. And of course, the Angel of God comes in the night, and puts to death 185,000 Assyrian soldiers. Which is just a ridiculous number. And Assyria probably could have conquered Jerusalem with a tenth that number. Numbers are no match for an almighty God. In fact, this tactical blunder probably rendered Assyria powerless, for putting all their baskets in one egg.

And of course, as Isaiah prophesied, Sennacherib was put to death by the sword while worshipping his god Nisroch.

2 Ki. 18: Sennacherib Runs His Mouth

2 Kings 18:22 "And if you say to me, "We are depending on the LORD our God"-isn't he the one whose high places and altars Hezekiah removed, saying to Judah and Jerusalem, "You must worship before this altar in Jerusalem"

While Hoshea flushed Israel down the toilet, Hezekiah took control in Judah. Apparently, he was a good man. He did what I was hoping he would do. (Man, I'm rooting for these Israelites.)  What made him like this? Ahaz was among the worst people ever. He certainly fell far from that fig tree. And it wasn't like Hezekiah engineered a gradual turnaround...he tore up the high places, the Asherah poles and the sacred stones. Remember that bronze serpent Moses made? Hezekiah destroyed that too. People were worshipping it. Of course. I wonder if Moses ever conceived that thing would one day become Nehushtan. 

It's probably no coincidence that Hezekiah followed the LORD, doing what Moses did, and then the LORD gave him success. That was the deal. 

I don't know what happened that Sennacherib was able to lay siege to the cities in Judah. Hezekiah was able to repel the Philistines, but when the Assyrians came, he apparently lost his cool. Or maybe he made a deal. I don't know, I wasn't there. But anyway, he pays tribute to Assyria with the gold from the temple. Its an interesting sort of sad thing that these things that are intended to imbue the temple with majesty and value end up being used to pay extortionists, time and again. Not what was meant to be.

Sennacherib follows by making a blustering propagandized speech to Hezekiah's staff through his field commander. He mocks Judah's military, their strategy, their alliance with Egypt, and like those in modern days, distorts who God is, referencing how Hezekiah destroyed "the LORD's" high places. 

Hezekiah's men, who wanted to spare the nearby Judahites from hearing this speech in Hebrew, requested that Sennacherib's commander speak to them in Aramaic. He refuses, continuing to diminish and ridicule Hezekiah's abilities and the LORD's power, instead promising a better life under Assyrian rule. No god, according to Sennacherib, has been able to deliver his people from the rule of Assyria, even Israel's false gods. Surprise. 

This made Hezekiah's men sad, of course, and they went back to the king mourning...he's going to do something awesome, right? That's how it works, right?

2 Ki. 17: Pictures of the Gone World

2 Kings 17:15 "They rejected his decrees and the covenant he had made with their fathers and the warnings he had given them. They followed worthless idols and themselves became worthless. They imitated the nations around them although the LORD had ordered them, "Do not do as they do," and they did the things the LORD had forbidden them to do."

This chapter paints a bleak picture of Israel's past, present and future. It's a pretty disheartening read. Hoshea is the last king of Israel, imprisoned by Shalmaneser, king of Assyria, who found out Hoshea had paid tribute instead to So, king of Egypt. With their king captured, and no God behind their army, Israel was an easy target for seige and conquest. It is at this point that God removes his hand of protection from Israel.

His covenant was direct and simple. Don't follow the other gods. Follow only the LORD. This, though simple in theory, apparently was very difficult in practice. Israel had a good time completely annihilating other nations, but I think they missed the point as to why they were doing it. Not only to be God's hand of judgement on sinful nations, but to keep their gods and practices out of sight, and out of mind.

But this appears to only work to a point. Time after time, the Israelites spared certain nations, spared certain people, made deals, and intermarried with those with other religions. Intended for strict monotheism, Israel gradually accelerated a slide into ardent polytheism. The invisible God was not enough for them. The tangibility and immediacy of graven images were quick answers. The invisible God had very visible and tangible power, ironically, while the idols had none whatsoever.

It's sad that not even one person or tribe could be mentioned as noteworthy in their devotion to God, whereas Noah was at least one person in the entire world.

The Israelites practiced their idolatry right alongside their worship of God. They were aware of the LORD. They had some sense of a need to worship Him. But it was a general sense, evidenced by their dual-purposed worship. The word says that they worshiped God along with their idols. Everywhere there were altars and incense and asherah poles.

Why would God allow this to happen? No, Israel chose this fate. A holy God requires holy devotion. God is simply not content to share the throne, share the temple, share offerings or altars. It is God and God alone.

Israel had no reason to be surprised, God made it clear numerous times through their history what would happen if they turned away, and it all came to pass. The death, the captivity, the scattering. What's next?

2 Ki. 16: Ahaz Does His Own Thing

2 Kings 16:11 "So Uriah the priest built an altar in accordance with all the plans that King Ahaz had sent from Damascus and finished it before King Ahaz returned."

Ahaz was Jotham's son. He is in the line of David, but he doesn't act like David, which is not Fark-worthy news. But he does manage to sacrifice his child, which is just about as detestable as one can get.Ahaz is known for generally doing whatever he wants in the way of religion. So he's religious, but kind of does whatever he wants, which is not what God instructed. The LORD intended his commands to be followed to the smallest detail. Ahaz is like, "Meh, whatever." For example, after paying the king of Assyria protection money from Aram and Israel with the gold and silver in the LORD's temple, he sees an altar that looks cool in Damascus.

He has this altar built by the priest, Uriah. And then he switches around the altars and basins at the temple to do whatever he wants. Forget what God said they were to be used for, Ahaz is going to do what he will.

This should end well.

2 Ki. 15: As The World Turns

2 Kings 15:29 "In the time of Pekah king of Israel, Tiglath-Pileser king of Assyria came and took Ijon, Abel Beth Maacah, Janoah, Kedesh and Hazor. He took Gilead and Galilee, including all the land of Naphtali, and deported the people to Assyria." 

This chapter briefly lists several kings of Israel, and a couple kings of Judah. None of them appear to have done anything really noteworthy. They were evil, killed pregnant women, lost a lot of land...you know...generally clowns.

Judah

Azariah (Uzziah) - Took the throne at 16, reigned 52 years. Was apparently good. Didn't remove the high places for offerings. Was afflicted with leprosy, and Jotham took care of the day-to-day operations of the kingshippery. That's a long time to have leprosy. I suppose any length of time is, but...

Jotham - Took the throne at 25, reigned 16 years. What is with these people not removing the high places? That seems to be the one thing keeping a king from having a truly great reign. Succeeded by his son Ahaz.

Israel

Zechariah - Reigned 6 months. Generally evil. This was the fourth and final generation removed from Jehu, as Elisha prophesied. And sure enough, he was assassinated publicly by Shallum, who assumed power.

Shallum - Reigned 1 month. Probably didn't have time to be evil or good, but I would assume he would have been evil, had the brutal Mehahem not overthrown him.

Menahem - Reigned 10 years. Ripped open the pregnant women of Tiphsah because they wouldn't open their gates to his marauders. Menahem was the first democrat, because he taxed the wealthy men. This money was used to pay off Pul, the invading Assyrian king. 

Pekahiah - Reigned 2 years, did evil. Besides his name sounding like someone telling a Black-rumped Flameback what to do, Pekahiah was assassinated in the palace by one of his chief officers, Pekah, who assumed the throne.

Pekah - Reigned 20 years, did evil. Pekah had a lot of trouble with the invading Assyrians. The king, Tiglath-Peliser took a bunch of land, and deported a bunch of land, and deported people to his land. Perhaps a nod to Dt 4:7. Hoshea follows the assassination trend, and kills Pekah, assuming the throne.

So this is the common thread between Israel and Judah. Israel refused to not be like Jeroboam, and Judah wouldn't centralize the offerings and sacrifices. Where were their priests?

2 Ki. 14: More Civil War

2 Kings 14:23 "In the fifteenth year of Amaziah son of Joash king of Judah, Jeroboam son of Jehoash king of Israel became king in Samaria, and he reigned forty-one years." 

Joash's son Amaziah takes power in Judah. Amaziah is reported as doing right in the eyes of the LORD, but not as good as David. And I thought, why didn't those who killed his father take control? Maybe they tried, but Amaziah had them killed. But he didn't kill their sons in accordance with Dt. 24:16. Which was nice. Amaziah's one great military exploit is listed as crushing the Edomites in the Valley of Salt.

Then he picks a fight with Jehoash from Israel. Jehoash rocks his world, but not before warning Amaziah in a cryptic parable about a thistle and a cedar. Amaziah stuck to his stance, and as a result was himself captured by Jehoash and Jerusalem was looted. He was killed upon his escape attempt. Should've consulted God, I s'pose.

In Judah, Amaziah is followed by his 16-year-old son, Azariah.

Meanwhile, Jeroboam II takes over for Jehoash in Israel. It says it was during the 15th year of Amaziah, so...who really captured Amaziah? Was there a co-regency? Was Amaziah taken in a time of transition? Hmm...

Jeroboam II was described as someone who didn't deviate from the example set by the first Jeroboam. While he was evil, God still used him to save territory. Jeroboam II increased Israel's territory. Apparently God was done reducing the size of Israel's territory...or Jeroboam was disobedient? 

After Jeroboam II's death, Zechariah became king.

2 Ki. 13: Elisha Dies

2 Kings 13:23 "But the LORD was gracious to them and had compassion and showed concern for them because of his covenant with Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. To this day he has been unwilling to destroy them or banish them from his presence."

With the litany of kings Israel had that did evil in the sight of the LORD, there is apparently one common thread. The Bible compares them all to Jeroboam. A dubious distinction, to have your own evil deeds be the benchmark of despotism and wrongdoing. Chapter 13's Jehoahaz and Jehoash, who followed Jehu, were no exception. However, God did listen to Jehoahaz's appeal to give relief temporarily to Israel from the oppression of Hazael. 

Jehoash was on the throne in Israel at the death of Elisha. As the final guidance, Elisha instructs Jehoash to shoot an arrow out the East Window. This was the LORD's Arrow. It signified defeat of Aram. Next, Jehoash was told to strike the ground with the arrows. He did so three times, and an angry Elisha told him that he should have done it like 5 or 6 times. Now they would only defeat Aram three times. That stinks.  Like Jehoash had any clue what Elisha was driving at. Possibly because he didn't know what God was driving at. He didn't consult the Urim or Thummim. That's what happens when a king's (nation's) relationship with God deteriorates. They are clueless and can't read the signs. But what I take away here is that the remembrance of the covenant with the forefathers comes from God. Usually it's a king or a priest that resets the covenant, but here God is the rememberer.

So Elisha dies, and he isn't taken as Elijah was, and even in death, he has the touch of life. Apparently some dudes were burying some guy, and when the Moabites came on their annual spring raid, they tossed the corpse into Elisha's grave. And when it touched his bones, the man sprang to his feet. Yiy. Can you imagine? If I was that guy, I'd say, "What, you guys just toss me into some random grave? No respect." Anyway, what happened to this guy? Did he go rest  with his fathers? Then comes back? What happens here!?

Eventually Hazael dies, and his son, Ben-Hadad, succeeds him. Yeah. Ben-Hadad. That was the guy Hazael murdered and overthrew. Then he names his son the same thing. High strangeness man. Can you imagine Barack Obama naming his son George when he becomes president?

2 Ki. 12: Extreme Makeover: Temple Edition

2 Kings 12:15 "They did not require an accounting from those to whom they gave the money to pay the workers, because they acted with complete honesty."

Joash is reported to have done what is right in the eyes of the LORD, except that he did not tear down the high places...where offerings and sacrifices were made. The high places sort of demeaned the purpose of the temple. They were people's attempts to reach God on their own terms, as opposed to the way that was commanded. This is bad, by the way. 

Jehoiada, who was a good guy, still had his failings. He apparently taught Joash well, excepting the high places, and then later when the money is collected for years as the temple's Building Fund disappears and no repairs are made for a decade and a half. He did not account for it. It just kind of got embezzled. As Smithers would say "I've got a much more sinister word for it, sir. Misappropriation."

Jehoiada made the first offering box in the history of time, and whenever it got filled, it was given over to the workmen to prepare materials and make the repairs to the temple. And I'm just floored by verse 15. They didn't have to account for the money, because of total honesty? Really? With the creation of earth, reanimation of the dead, and the floating axhead in mind, I find this the hardest to believe of all the bits in the Bible to this point.

Anyway, Hazael from Aram comes and is going to bully Jerusalem, but Joash pays him off. With this Era of Good Feelings, I would have assumed that Joash's army, with the help of the LORD, could have easily repelled any attack. Why didn't they do it? Was Joash afraid? Did he not have a commander like Abner or something? What's the deal? In chapter ten, the LORD was said to begin to reduce Israel's territory. Perhaps Hazael, devious assassin that he was, was God's instrument in this. Even when Judah's leadership took a turn for the positive.

Joash was assassinated by his officials. It doesn't say why. They may not have appreciated his stance on paying off Hazael, or maybe it was his adherence to the covenant. It may have been his annoying laugh. Anyway, something he did made someone mad.

2 Ki. 11: Child on a Leash

2 Kings 11:18 "All the people of the land went to the temple of Baal and tore it down. They smashed the altars and idols to pieces and killed Mattan the priest of Baal in front of the altars. Then Jehoiada the priest posted guards at the temple of the LORD."

It looks to me like Athaliah, Ahaziah's mother, was kind of the shadow king of Judah. When she found out Ahaziah was dead, she went around killing his family. She really wanted to be in charge. Athaliah's daughter by Jehoram took Ahaziah's infant son Joash and hid him in the one place Athaliah was certain to never look, the temple of the LORD.

Jehoiada, the priest, sets up guards at the temple to protect the youngster with extreme prejudice. To use lethal force even. At that point, he brings out Joash, who was seven, and crowns him the king. Athaliah, who was apparently not winning any popularity contests, comes out to see what the scuttlebutt is at the temple, and sees the rejoicing, and hears the trumpeting, and freaks out.

The guards drag Athaliah out of the temple, and put her to the sword. Jehoiada renews the covenant. Again. Between the LORD and the people. He commits the people to the LORD. Again. Which is nice to do. We'll have to see if this one takes. What steps does he take? He reads the covenant again. Then they smash the idols and kill the priest of Baal. Interesting that they only smash their own copy of Baal. Not the other copies from outside. Anyway...Joash is brought from the temple to the palace, and is ensconced on the throne. A boy king. Can you imagine how heads would roll for his tantrums? We'll see how he does. He doesn't exactly come from good parental stock.

2 Ki. 10: Jehu's Cleansing Continues

2 Kings 10:25 "As soon as Jehu had finished making the burnt offering, he ordered the guards and officers: "Go in and kill them; let no one escape." So they cut them down with the sword. The guards and officers threw the bodies out and then entered the inner shrine of the temple of Baal."

Jehu continues his vendetta against those who did evil in the sight of the LORD. He wipes out the entire line of Ahab (70 men), in accordance with Elijah's prophecy. He then wipes out the line of Ahaziah (42 men). God keeps his word with Jehu in numerous ways. His warnings that those who do not listen to him will face consequences, and Jehu delivers them. And its always death. Bloodshed. Idolatry, while not a blood-shedding action, breaks the first commandment. And as idolatry ran rampant, the other commands and laws fell away. This is why it was really important to kep the first commandment.

He even inspired that scene in The Patriot where all the people are burned in that church, you know? He assembles all the priests of Baal under the guise of offering a sacrifice to him. None of the priests see through the ruse, despite the reputation Jehu must have had at that point. Jehu did exactly what he said he would do. Not so here. He has all of his guards rush in and slaughter all the priests of Baal. I guess it was one convenient way to wipe them all out.

Jehu wasn't perfect, and even he caved into the sins of Jeroboam. But because of Jehu's initial zeal, God promises his line would sit on the throne to the fourth generation. It would suck to be Jehu's great-great-grandson. He gets nothing. That is, if God's word comes to fruition, which I assume it will.

I gotta get my hands on the book of the annals of the kings of Israel.

2 Ki. 9: Jehu Cleans House

2 Kings 9:22 "When Joram saw Jehu he asked, 'Have you come in peace, Jehu?'
'How can there be peace,' Jehu replied, 'as long as all the idolatry and witchcraft of your mother Jezebel abound?'"

All riiiiiight. Action! Finally someone does something about this bunch of evildoers. Jehu is anointed king over Israel by a prophet, and is given instructions to destroy the current despots in charge. It was getting kind of tiresome to read about how all these guys in a row were evil, and were deeply into sin. Jehu must have been a man of some reputation or heart to be anointed by God as the king of Isreal. For so long, men have just assumed power, by birthrite or by bloody coup. The last king anointed by God was...Solomon. Long dead.

Jehu then goes about his business in speedy fashion, driving his chariot like a madman. He bumrushes Jezreel, where Joram and Ahaziah were hanging out, recovering from their battle with Hazael. The lookouts see this maniac driving across the plain, pedal to the metal, and send out messengers. He blows by them , bringing his troops straight into Jezreel like a scene out of Lord of the Rings. Joram is Arrowed!! by Jehu himself, and Ahaziah is wounded, dying a short time later in Megiddo.

What happens to Jezebel? She's thrown out of the castle by some eunuchs, and then later when they go to bury her, dogs have eaten her corpse. Tasty. She was unrecognizable as Jezebel. Awesome.

2 Ki. 8: Royal Line of Succession...Er...Failure

2 Kings 8:12 "Why is my lord weeping?" asked Hazael.

"Because I know the harm you will do to the Israelites," he answered. "You will set fire to their fortified places, kill their young men with the sword, dash their little children to the ground, and rip open their pregnant women."

The Shunammite woman's land is restored. She was told by Elisha to go away for seven years, because her land would be confaminated. She wisely goes and lives amongst the Philistines for some reason. Having a conference with Gehazi (pre-leprosy?) and the king, she has her land restored, and all the money which was given to her. So she gets hooked up. Creditors at bay. A son. Son restored. Homestead restored after famine. I guess she got God's Deluxe Package! Was it merely because she built the man of God a room? Probably. And I wondered why she was different than all these kings who offered Elisha wealth and property. Probably because she just wanted to be kind. Excess isn't kindness. Excess stinks of making a deal, a compromise. Something the proper prophet was instructed and warned against...with dire consequences for disobedience.

Moving on, more kings. More evildoers. Another in the line of David is evil, but God keeps the candle burning for David. David's line must have some significance above all the others.

In Aram, Ben-Hadad is murdered and succeeded by Hazael. Hazael get's verse 12's gem prophesied about him.

In Judah, Jehoram succeeds Jehoshaphat, and is evil. Ahaziah succeeds Jehoram, and is evil too. Ahaziah took Joram of Israel to war against Hazael of Aram.So, good times Israel/Judah/Aram. Way to go.

2 Ki. 7: The Case of the Plundering Lepers

2 Kings 7:16 "Then the people went out and plundered the camp of the Arameans. So a seah of flour sold for a shekel, and two seahs of barley sold for a shekel, as the LORD had said."

Being unfamiliar with the economy in Israel a million years ago, I wouldn't know from anything if a shekel for a seah of flour or two seahs of barley was a good deal, as Elisha said the deal would be. Apparently it would be, because of the reference to God opening the floodgates of heaven. Presumably for rain. To grow flour and barley. The king apparently wouldn't be alive to see it, though.

Meanwhile, these lepers are just chilling out, kind of running out the clock, and they decide to go into the city, because if they stay out where they are, they're dead, and if they go into the city, they may be spared. They happen upon the Aramean army camp. Which is deserted. Because the Arameans were duped by the LORD into thinking the Hittites and the Egyptians were attacking. Which they weren't. So the lepers plunder their tents. Its interesting that they say what they're doing is wrong. Not the stealing. No, that's totally fine. Its the not sharing the news with the king. Aramea was the enemy. So the king, who had no idea what was going on, sent out some scouts to see what made the Arameans flee.

And in the panic, the king got trampled in the gateway. He would not be able to see the low-cost barley economy. Just as Elisha said.

2 Ki. 6: Swing that Gospel Axe

2 Kings 6:16 "Don't be afraid," the prophet answered. "Those who are with us are more than those who are with them."

So Elisha's out with the prophets, and they tell him where they meet is too small, so they build another bigger meeting place. An axe falls apart (they had Wal-Marts back then, too) and the head flies into the river. Gone. Work done, everyone chills. Wrong. Elisha cuts a stick, throws it into the river, and the axhead floats to the service. No, the axhead it wasn't made of balsam. Probably iron.

So that's a miracle, which is neat.

Aram eventually goes to war with Israel, and sneak attacks don't work, because Elisha, the prophet keeps telling the king. Easy, thinks the king of Aram. He'll just send everyone, and forego surprise for sheer numbers. Elisha's servant freaks out when he sees how many of the enemy are outside. Elisha's like Mr. Miyagi, though...cool. God sends an army of flaming angels and chariots. How awesome is that. It says the hills were filled with them. Elisha prays and has the eyes of the servant opened to see them. So...are the non-prophets eyes closed by God to certain things? How much more confident would you be if God showed you everything you could not see otherwise.

Then Elisha prays and has the eyes of the attacking Aramean army closed with blindness. Then this army is led to Samaria, where, in an act of grace, Elisha has the king feed them instead of slaughter them. Weird change of course for a nation that typically slaughters their enemies completely. I imagine the enemy army had to be trembling in fear as they were led all that way...

Then a famine happens which leads to cannibalism. Which...I don't recall was explicitly condemned in the Bible at this point. But it sounds like something...something that happens when you don't follow God completely...oh yeah. The king naturally blames the man of God, and sends hitmen to kill him. Of course Elisha sees it. So, we'll see what happens.